My Period Story.
My period story is intertwined with past experiences of disordered eating, over-exercising and more recently, fertility issues. The story isn’t over yet but it’s reaching a pivotal point so I thought I would share it with you now. Maybe one of you reading this can relate, or maybe I can reach you and stop you from sliding down the slippery slope before it’s too late.
I have hypothalamic amenorrhea (HA). Which unfortunately is becoming more and more common amongst women. HA is essentially a lack of periods (for 3 consecutive months or more) stemming from insufficient levels of the female reproductive hormones.
Causes of HA include:
- disordered/restrictive eating;
- low bodyweight;
- low body fat
- over exercising; and/or
- prolonged and excessive stress and anxiety
Look at it this way, HA is your body’s way of telling you that the environment you have created is not a “safe” place for reproduction. When things go amiss in your body, when something isn’t quite right, your menstrual cycle is often the first outward sign – be it with irregularity or disappearing all together. This is because whilst having periods is critical for the survival of the human race, it’s not essential for your own survival and so is a process your body can stop to divert energy elsewhere.
My story goes back quite a few years. I’m pretty ashamed of my naivety now. I wish I had paid attention, been better informed and acted sooner but this is my reality.
At the age of 15 I had horrendous periods – crippling pain, sickness and just an awful time of it. After visiting my GP I was put on the oral contraceptive pill.
In case you didn’t know (and I didn’t), when you’re taking a contraceptive pill you don’t actually have a period - it’s just a withdrawal ‘bleed’ and you don’t ovulate.
Fast-forward a few years (to about the age of 21) when I decided that being on the pill wasn’t for me anymore. At this point in time I was obsessed with having what I deemed a ‘clean and healthy’ lifestyle - no synthetic hormones for sure! Everything I ate was homemade or unrefined, I tried all manner of faddy trends, not to lose weight but to be the epitome of health (whatever that means?!) On top of this I was working my ass off in an apprenticeship doing nightshifts in a bakery – heavy manual labour, long hours, crappy sleep – all whilst running a lot.
I came off the pill and didn’t get my period…for 8 years!
At first I didn’t think anything of it, I was told it might take some time and fertility didn’t even cross my mind. I recall even thinking that not having a period saved so much hassle!
Roll on a few more years, still no period so I went to get checked out. I saw a gynaecologist for a few years who was to be quite frank, a bit rubbish. I had blood tests, ultrasounds, more blood tests and was sent away to wait it out. Eventually, in 2019, I was referred to the fertility clinic as by this time we were serious about starting a family.
Our fertility doctor diagnosed HA straight away. Finally after so many years I had a name for what I was going through. Still, the ins and outs and reasons for HA weren’t explained. We started hormone treatment and had 4 unsuccessful attempts to bring about ovulation. All throughout this time the process didn’t sit well with me. I wanted babies but I didn’t want invasive appointments and daily hormone injections to get there, not if there was something I could do about it myself.
In the years leading up to this I had relaxed many of my restrictive eating habits but continued subconsciously making ‘healthy’ decisions like choosing the healthier option on the menu rather than the thing I wanted most, tracking on MFP occasionally and I was still pretty fanatical about working out a lot.
Having done my own research on HA I sought help from a Nutritional Therapist (Emma Stanley Nutrition). The resulting plan encompassed eating more, reducing intense exercise and spending more time in the parasympathetic nervous system (the relaxed state). All of this was geared at balancing hormone health to bring back my natural cycle.
A few months on this plan and in December 2019 I got my first natural period in 8 years! Then again. And again. I was ecstatic!
Then I lost it.
In hindsight I took my foot off of the pedal once I thought I was ‘fixed’. I upped my exercise, got super busy with work and didn’t focus so much on eating enough for the amount of activity I was doing.
I spent a couple of months in denial, thinking it’s been a long time since I had a cycle, things are just irregular, it will come back soon and everything will be okay.
Not the case. And so, I have delved deep into learning about women’s health, HA, hormones and menstrual cycles. I know that HA can be reversed with fuelling appropriately, dialling down exercise and chilling the f**k out, giving your body what it needs and craves so desperately.
In theory the steps to reversing HA and getting your period back are simple. I feel the hardest thing is overcoming the mental barriers; accepting that you probably will gain weight, you’ll likely have to dramatically reduce exercise for some time, you’ll sometimes feel uncomfortable eating so much after having eaten so restrictively for time and it will require patience.
A month or so after the UK went into COVID-19 lockdown I got my period back. I don’t think it’s any coincidence that with this came no heavy workouts, time, effort and opportunity to eat more plus work and the general pace of life having slowed down. As I said earlier, it’s still early days and I’m currently waiting for my next period but it’s made me realise that I do have at least some control over this situation.
What I have learned more so than anything from this experience is that your menstrual cycle says a lot about you. It’s not an upheaval, it’s nothing to be ashamed about or kept quiet every month. In fact, it’s an important piece of the puzzle that is living a healthy life and if you don’t have it then please understand that this is a sign that you may be getting into some unhealthy habits.
Since speaking about menstrual cycles and all that comes with them across my social media I have been getting so much engagement and so many questions asked, which goes to show that this is a topic not talked about enough. It’s time to open up the conversation.
If you think you’re suffering with HA then I absolutely recommend you go see your doctor to make sure there are no underlying issues resulting in your missed/lost period in the first instance. If you’re diagnosed with HA then hopefully your doctor can help, perhaps with a referral but if not then know that you can help yourself.
Had I been filled with the knowledge I have now, I wouldn’t have wasted so many years being obsessed with the look of my body. I would have been fuelling it well, moving for functionality and enjoyment rather than punishment and I would have shown my body the respect it deserves. I would have taken the outwards signs that I wasn’t taking care of my body seriously and understood that not having a period is NOT okay. It’s NOT normal. But then, had I done all of those things I wouldn’t have been equipped with the knowledge I have now. I wouldn’t have been able to help others. I wouldn’t be so passionate about spreading the word.
HA Resources:
The number one book on HA has to be ‘No Period, Now What?’ by Dr. Nicola Rinaldi. This book comes recommended by so many in the HA community and really sets out the parameters for recovery.
www.noperiodnowhat.com is also a great resource for more information and the FB page is a fantastic community to get involved with.
Dr. Stacy Sims, PhD also has a lot to say on HA and female hormones as a whole from the point of exercise and fuelling. Her book ‘Roar’ is incredible - whilst it’s aimed more at athletes there are so many take away points that the general female population can take away.
Interesting studies include:
Wade GN, Jones JE. “Neuroendocrinology of Nutritional Infertility.” American Journal of Physiology: Regulatory, Integrative and Comparative Physiology. 287(6) 2004: R1277-1296. doi: 10.1152/ajpregu.00475.2004
Loucks AB, et al. “Alterations in the Hypothalamic-Pituitary-Ovarian and the Hypothalamic-Pituitary-Adrenal Axes in Athletic Women.” The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism. 68(2) 1989: 402-11. doi: 10.1210/jcem-68-2-402